Friday, March 5, 2010

Mix in This and That

I'm in college right now and i've left all alone since my roomates are all went back home and going out with her love ones and yes,i have to attend a stupid modules this week. THANK YOU! Right now,my feelings are empty. Like theres a big hole in my chest straight thru my heart. Like i'm missing something that i cant even remember. Like i've been sleeping forever and just woke up.

Current emotions ; Sad+happy+scared+nervous+pathetic+confius+high+dizzy+jigles.
Conditions ; Mixing everything. This and that.
Conclusion ; Emotions Conflict

I feel like i want to cry out loud right but i cant express it. I miss my mom. I miss my old friends. I miss the easy-going and hyperactive+hyperhappy attitude that i used to cherish in every single seconds in my life. I feel like i've kinda lost. Loosing trust in people,loosing the guts that i used to grab in my hand,loosing my looks,loosing my educations level but mostly loosing in myself.

Why is this happening to me? I'm now scared to tell anything to my own friend,to people around me. I'm now scared that someone will do something bad to me. I'm scared that i will fall and dont have the spirits to stand up again. I just wish i can tell someone what i do feel right now but i dont know how to tell. My tongue will definitely be numb and i'll just dont know how to talk.
Why i have to face all these emotions? Why? Please god,save me. Give me some courage so that i can live on peacefully. Please.

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